Forget about terrorism, car accidents or being murdered. You are far more likely to have your life ruined by a lawyer these days.
OK, I’m going out on a limb here but it won’t be the first time. So, here goes:
It’s pretty easy to sit in our comfortable, warm homes and watch the news each night knowing our future, and the future of our children, is secure for the time being. We live in communities with little crime, predictable futures and with reliable municipal infrastructures and superior school systems.
Bill Cosby was not only a hero among blacks, but he was beloved by white Americans as well. His persona was so revered that it crossed all social, racial and generational lines.
• Television: TLC cancelled its popular reality series Here Comes Honey Boo Boo following news that Honey Boo Boo’s mother was in a relationship with a man who was convicted of molesting a young relative 10 years ago. In a related development, sales of Mountain Dew plunged 50 percent overnight.
You’re sitting in a large, dimly lit room with friends or family. An air of anticipation is palpable throughout the packed room. You’re chatting with your spouse or friend when suddenly the lights dim and booming music reverberates throughout the room. You turn to face the big screen with a satisfied smile across your face and prepare for a journey. For the next few hours you will be absent from your own life and present in another’s.
Every year, as predictable as a full moon or Lindsay Lohan being arrested for shoplifting, some killjoy mounts their soapbox to tell us that Christmas no longer has any meaning because Americans spend too much money on Christmas gifts, and evil retailers have made a mockery of the true meaning of Christmas. I once believed that also, but no more.
I am not a Donald Trump fan. But the media backlash resulting from his statement about temporarily (a word the mainstream media forgot to include) denying Muslims immigrant status is just another example of mainstream media mind-control through journalistic deception via omission and distortion.
I don’t know about you, but when I fly I generally look at my fellow sheep and wonder if any of them are terrorists. A little research provided me with some ‘confidential’ criteria that TSA-trained airport screeners use to identify potential terrorists. I found the information interesting, as well as useful, as I am generally the one in the crowd that undergoes ‘enhanced’ screening. Based on the info below, maybe I can avoid the inevitable and humiliating full body scans of the past.
What do you think is the single greatest technological development of all time? The light bulb that brought us out of the dark ages? The telephone, which bridged the continent with instant communication? Maybe the combustion engine that was responsible for ushering in the great American manufacturing era that resulted in hundreds of thousands of good-paying jobs? Most would likely list the personal computer and the Internet at or near the top of their list.
• “Whenever I watch TV and see all those starving kids all over the world, I can’t help but cry. I mean I’d love to be skinny like that but not with all those flies and stuff.”
That ‘clink’ you heard last week was the sound of another common-sense door being slammed shut and locked by the liberals that are allowed to run amok across America more and more as the Obama presidency sprints to the finish line, minus the burden of another election.
America is often heralded as the best example of democracy in the world. And yet almost all experts agree that the U.S. voting process is absurdly dysfunctional and in need of a complete overhaul. It simply is not reflective of the enormous responsibilities — and consequences — of the elections it administrates.
As much as I would have enjoyed skewering the CNBC moderators who embarrassed all of America with their silly, irrelevant and juvenile questions to Republican candidates in the latest debate, I would rather take a week off from politics and, instead, provide some humor with these funny, yet accurate, definitions of common words.